First we must make certain assumptions that we accept as truth for the purpose of this article. You can change you opinion after you finish reading, but at least while you read, it will be beneficial.
First, that we are fragmented beings and not able to stay focused on one thought for longer than a few moments.
Second, that what we believe, our opinions, and how we function is programmed by the impressions we are faced with, i.e. how we see the world is due to what we see in the media even if it is fake news.
Now we can contemplate the following.
How many movies, plays, songs, stories are about heartbreak? How many stories are there of two people finding each other and being in true love, and then one promptly dies, or for whatever reason they cannot be together?
How many love stories end in pain, and all in minutes or an hour of our time in watching the story. The time relation is important because it subconsciously makes your mind believe in the limit of happiness, and that the bomb may fall any moment.
Now consider how long you can stay focused on contemplating an idea or thought about how your mind works.
What if, due to movies, real life and fiction stories, music and such, the impressions that our mind feeds on and forms its belief system, programs us to relate love with pain, a pain that lasts a lifetime, as in Romeo and Juliet which really ends badly.
We learn that true love lasts only in rare occasions, usually obviously unachievable or unrealistic fairy tales. Success stories are subconsciously taken as fictitious and could never happen in reality, but the painful ones are accepted as inevitable, infidelity and divorce.
- Try This Exercise Watch your common thoughtless and automatic sayings to see how negative they are. Your mind may have an underlying negative outlook and will allow thoughts, even positive ones, to fall to a negative end.
When, or even if, we can see how our belief system is programmed by such impressions, we can only see the effects for an instant before our fragmentation prevents us from going deeply enough into this realization so we can get free of it.
If this is so, then we are truly set up to destroy any positive things in our life. We have a built in self-destruct mechanism. Self-destruct in the sense of finding our soul mate and experiencing true unconditional love.
- Here is another Exercise List all the stories, real or fictional, which end in pain. Then make another list of all the stories or songs that end in happiness. As a sort of diet, spend the next few months ONLY exposing your mind to the positive ones.
How many times have you been pushed away from someone because of their jealousy or that they have determined you are or will be unfaithful. The distrust just kills any passion and feelings of love. Many times, something can look bad, but is not, and only looks that way because you do not have all the facts.
The problem is that if your mind is so inundated with negative thoughts, then it will fill in any missing gaps in a story with negativity. This is why we suggest that you become allergic to negative love stories and build a trusting attitude which may help your next partner feel you are so wonderful, that the thought of leaving you is the only intense pain they feel and will never risk that chance.